‘‘I won’t let people in again. NEVER’’
This was the way my brain processed after fights with friends whom I thought were forever, being lied to, bitched about, isolated to fend for myself ALONE.
I swore that my walls would always be up. High. Impossible for anybody to break, crack or fire at with a canon. I’d become the secluded princess, forever alone, away from the manipulative world but, there’s always a but.
But I still hoped that someday, somebody would come-my knight in shining armour or maybe a friend who would hold my hand and teach me to walk again?
Patience does pay off, doesn’t it?
I met you.
I was scared to commit at first but slowly I embraced having you in my life, slowly you became my life line, my speed dial and you brought me the happiness which I once knew cause I had known somebody remotely like you a long time ago.
You’re leaving now, for good.
I’m trying to accept the fact that you won’t be around to be my emotional support but somewhere on the inside, it’s still a joke to me, hasn’t struck me yet or probably I’m not ready to open my eyes and face reality.
I’ve been a sucker at goodbyes, so it won’t be a goodbye. It will just be a you’ll be missed so come back soon my friend. We have history to make.
I’m scared to walk out of the confined four walls,
I’m scared to roam about alone in the malls,
I don’t feel secure,
There is no safety any more,
Too many restrictions,
Thoughts and ideals of individuals causing frictions,
I would rather be treated like a boy,
Not just a use and throw toy,
I want to be free like a bird,
Not always be considered another target in a herd,
I want to have an open life,
Not threatened with society’s knife,
All I wish for is a better future
For all those little girls
Who deserve to be nurtured to become beautiful pearls…
This poem was written post the Delhi rape case and is one that is really close to my heart.